Growing up...

It's karma I tell you.. it truly is...

But I guess its one of those things you shrug off and just accept its nature and its cold hard harsh truth... "Its just him/her being him/her..."

We grow up and we become distant from people we grew up with because our lives change and we have different separate paths. We meet, we become friends and then suddenly something in you changes and you no longer have that yearning to be like how you were before. I know for a fact that I have been through that and I know that I would go through it over and over again as time passed...

Fate lasts for only so long. Sometimes, its a short period of time but its enough to change who you are and where you're heading. Its enough to keep forever. Just mere memories.. memories that you know for a fact, will be with you through the end of time...

Most of the time, this process hurts. The pain, sometimes, so unbearable... and most of the time, you know you can't do anything about it and sometimes, its self inflicted. The thing is, its inevitable. You just have to go through the pain.. because, its all part of growing up and finding out who we are through association with others.

I know that I have almost pushed out a huge number of the people I used to associate myself with on a daily basis. The thing is, I'm really sad about it.. sad that things turned out the way it did.. but at the same time, I'm not regreting it one bit. Despite all that, I'm happy where I am now.

I'm happy with the people I associate myself with now... and I cannot deny that I feel much closer to my family more than ever. It feels great... The thing is, these people always make me feel like I never left home. They make me feel like I'm still there with them as they laugh or cry. They make me feel like I'm in their midst even when I'm 7000km away... It's sad to say, that I really never felt this way last year. It's sad to say that I went home feeling like an outsider because I missed out so much...

But the good thing is, this year... when I return home.. I know that I won't feel like an outsider. I won't feel like I've left for as long as I actually am... and its all thanks to the constant communication I have with these people. Nothing feels better than to be part of something even when you know that you're not physically there.

These are the people I want to associate myself with. These are the people I want around me when I get married and have my own kids. These are the people I want at my home when I have bbq parties or just to hang out with on the weekends after a long week at work. You know what I mean?

Brothers and Sisters in-Christ do become your family... like family.. absence is never an issue because they welcome you with open arms no matter how far and long you've been away.

I love you guys so much.. and thank you.. I know that after confirmation, we weren't as close as we used to be.. but by the end of last year, I felt like how I used to during confirmation. The love, the hugs, the kisses, the laughing, the tears... everything..

To the ones that I've become distant with.. I'm sorry but I guess that's life. There are people who I want to keep for as long as I can... but I guess it takes two to tango...

Life is full of shit sometimes... hell, it makes things more interesting...